The things we hate about ourselves aren't more real

dismal batting average, our fear of math, or our big feet.

The trouble is, the more we feel sorry for ourselves, the more we have to feel sorry about.

 And though it probably doesn't hurt to indulge in a little self-pity once in a while, how unfortunate -- and limiting -- it can be to let those attitudes define us. 

The things we hate about ourselves are no more real than the things we like about ourselves.

The trick is to dwell on the things we like instead of those we don't. 

Even on days when we are sure we are the least lovable creatures in the world, we can "act as if" we like ourselves.

What a surprise at the end of the day, to find out that we actually do!

Harsh words, demeaning punishments, too many silent treatments, taught us who we were. 

Many of us remain disheartened, even diminished because of these powerful memories.

When we accept criticism as accurate and deserved, it molds our characters, and eventually we live up to these assessments.

The good news is that we are in control of our own thoughts and attitudes, and in this respect we are all-powerful. The decision is ours to cast aside another's criticism, replacing it with positive self-talk.

However, to successfully undo the harm others' words have caused takes daily dedication to our own positive reinforcement. Those who are confident and assured have internalized a positive dialogue with themselves.

Today is a new beginning.

I can make a fresh start by believing that I am a worthwhile person and my contribution is necessary.